I like my home like I like my romance novels: dark, dramatic, and full of questionable decisions.
This is my “pretend I’m thriving” list—add to cart and delude responsibly.
For when you need 40oz of emotional support.
STANLEY Quencher H2.0 Tumbler w/ Handle & Straw
Turkish cotton: because basic bath towels won’t cut it in your villain era.
American Soft Linen 4pc 600 GSM Cotton Towels
Because eyeballing it is how we got here.
Pyrex Essentials 3-Pack Glass Measuring Cups
Feels like luxury, priced like delusion.
Mellanni Extra Deep Queen Sheets 4PC Gray
For setting the mood—whether it’s romance or existential crisis.
Leeleberd 100ft RGB LED Strip Lights w/ Remote
For guests, bad decisions, or your third nap of the day.
MAXYOYO Folding Sofa Bed, Convertible Chair
Powerful suction—like your toxic ex, but this one has actual benefits.
Bissell CleanView Compact Upright Vacuum 3508
For when you need to rinse off shame, sarcasm, and dry shampoo.
10 Inch Rain Shower Head Combo w/ 5 Settings
Because my emotional baggage deserves crispy fries in half the time.
Ninja 8QT DoubleStack Air Fryer, 6-in-1, Black
Because nothing says “emotional stability” like projecting the entire galaxy onto your ceiling at 3AM.
