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LS/Swinger/Couples This or That
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items Not all products are created equal. Some are gimmicky, overpriced, or just plain useless—while others are worth every penny. In this list, I break down the difference between what not to buy and what you should be using instead. Whether it's gear, ga...
Sections
6
Oils and Lubes
Entry BDSM
Vibrators
Edible panties
Plugs
Random things I don't like
Oils and Lubes
When it comes to oils and lubes, you wouldn’t marinate a steak in artificial flavors and weird chemicals—so why do that to yourself? Anything you put on your skin, especially in intimate areas, gets absorbed. That means additives, synthetic fragrance...
Dumb and Dangerous: Warming lubes and oils might sound fun, but in reality, they’re packed with harsh chemicals that have no business near your most sensitive areas. These formulas don’t just stay put—they spread everywhere, increasing the risk of ir...
Heating Massage Oil - Target
If you want a sensual massage without the risk of irritation or a crime scene-level cleanup, opt for fractionated coconut oil or jojoba oil. Both are body-safe, non-comedogenic, and won’t stain your sheets like a crime scene from an 80s slasher film.
Jojoba Oil
If you're looking for a full-body, no-friction, skin-on-skin massage, Nuru Gel is the way to go. This water-based, ultra-slippery gel is designed for sensual body gliding, making it perfect for deep connection and erotic massage. Unlike sticky or gre...
Magic Gel Nuru Massage Therapy Gel
Flavored lubes might sound fun in theory, but in reality, they’re a one-way ticket to irritation, UTIs, and yeast infections. Most of them contain sugar, artificial sweeteners, and questionable additives that throw off your body's natural balance—esp...
Flavored Lubricants
When in doubt, stick with a high-quality, unflavored water-based lube. It’s the most versatile, body-safe, and compatible with all toys and condoms. No weird additives, no sugar, no risk of throwing your body’s chemistry into chaos. Water-based lubes...
Lubes: Personal & Water Based Lubricants | K-Y®
You can use this for massage oil and lube. Plus it taste good. Not for people with a nut allergy.
Coconut Oil
Another option if you are concerned about allergens.
Hypoallergenic : Lube - Target
Entry BDSM
Curious About Kink? Read This First. I get it—you want to spice things up in the bedroom. Maybe you read Fifty Shades of Grey and thought, Yeah, I want that. But here’s the thing: BDSM isn’t just about blindfolds and handcuffs—it’s an art that requir...
No. Do not jump into BDSM with these cheap fuzzy handcuffs. They are not comfortable. They can hurt your partner. They are not easy to get out of. There are better options.
Fuzzy Handcuffs Pink : Health & Household
Start Here: The Simple Silk Tie If you're new to bondage, skip the complicated knots and intimidating gear—a silk men’s tie is the perfect place to start. You probably already have one, and it’s soft, smooth, and naturally easy to escape from with a ...
Silk Ties
A simple silk robe belt is a great first step into restraint play—soft, versatile, and less intimidating than ropes and knots. If you’re curious about shibari, this can be a fun, low-risk way to explore without diving straight into suspension rigging...
Japanese Silk Rope
Am I a fan of these beginner BDSM kits? A little. They offer variety, which is great for exploring new sensations, but they also tend to be cheaply made—so don’t expect them to last long. How to Get the Most Out of a Kit: Test each item individually ...
Bondage Kits & BDSM Sets | Adam & Eve Sex Toy Store
Vibrators
This is your standard, no-frills vibrator—a motor, a vibrating tip, and a single mission: buzz and hope for the best. And hey, that might be enough for you! If you enjoy simple vibration, there’s nothing wrong with that. But let’s be real—technology ...
LADYS MOOD Plastic Vibrator, Blue, 7 Inch
Edible panties
There is no alternative to edible panties because no one should use this product ever.
No. Just No. Edible panties are a crime against both sex and snacks. They’re basically a stale fruit roll-up masquerading as lingerie, except they taste worse than the real thing. And let’s not forget: One size fits all? More like one size fits nobod...
Edible Underwear - Sex Novelties
Plugs
If you’re feeling frisky and want to explore, plugs can be a great addition to play—but let’s cover the basics to keep things fun and safe: Start Small. If you’re new to plugs, go for a smaller size or a trainer kit to ease into the experience comfor...
Not all plugs are created equal, and when it comes to something going inside your body, quality matters. Here’s what you need to look for: Body-Safe Materials Only – Stick to silicone or metal, as they’re non-porous, easy to clean, and won’t harbor b...
Amazon Best Sellers: Best Anal Plugs
If you're curious about backdoor play, an anal trainer kit is the best way to ease in—literally. These kits come with progressively sized plugs, allowing your body to adjust gradually and comfortably instead of diving straight into something too big,...
Best Anal Training Sets
Random things I don't like
As the title says, the intention is to spice things up in your bedroom when really you just want to have sex. Talk to your partner. Communicate. Don't rely on gimmick products to do that for you.
In theory, love dice sound like a fun way to spice things up. In reality? They’re just gambling with your sex life. Sure, they add an element of surprise, but due to pure chance, you might end up sucking toes three turns in a row—and if that’s not yo...
Glow in The Dark Love Dice for Adults
If you’ve never explored BDSM before, a ball gag is NOT where you start. It might seem like a fun, kinky addition, but gags restrict breathing and communication, which makes them one of the more advanced BDSM tools—not an entry-level toy. Why You Sho...
Mouth Gags & Muzzles: Ball Gags | The Stockroom
"Novelty" and "Condom" Should Never Be in the Same Sentence Your sexual health is not a joke, so why trust it to a gimmicky, unreliable piece of latex with a clown nose? Novelty condoms are not tested for actual protection—which means they might be f...
Funny condoms (novelties) - Condom Gifts - Condomerie