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plants for people who "kill everything" 🌿
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items have you served a sentence in plant jail for murder? this list includes low-fuss houseplants for plant beginners, type-B plant parents, and those who can’t seem to keep anything alive.
they don’t have to be expensive ether! plants go on sale all the...
bright and fast growing trailing plant thats pretty forgiving if you forget about it. the color makes it look way more high-maintenance than it actually is.
light ☀️: medium-bright indirect light is best for brighter color but will still survive lo...
Neon Pothos
one of the most “alive” houseplants you could own—a lot of people say they are difficult since they dramatically flop when it’s thirsty but she’ll perk right back up after watering. it literally tells you what it needs.
light ☀️: medium-bright indir...
Peace Lily (Spathiphyllum)
the ultimate neglect-friendly plant. they originate from African deserts so they’re tough, architectural, and more likely to forgive under watering than overwatering.
light ☀️: low-bright indirect is best but can tolerate some direct sun if acclimat...
Snake Plant (Sansevieria)
built for people who forget they own plants. it has big potato like rhizomes in their root system so they store water there. handles both drought and low light like a cave dwelling vampire.
light ☀️: low-bright indirect
water💧: let the soil comple...
ZZ Plant
a beginner classic for a reason: fast-growing, forgiving (i brought one back from 3 wilted leaves to a full tiered hanging basket), easy to propagate, and happy in a wide range of environments.
light ☀️: low-bright indirect with brighter light givin...
Golden Pothos
another easy, fat-growing trailing plant thats tolerant of the occasional missed watering without demanding perfect conditions.
light☀️: medium-bright indirect is best but will tolerate lower light
water💧: let top 1-2” of soil dry first
Heartleaf Philodendron
whimsical af and secretly not a palm, the trunk stores water for you. perfect if your brand of plant murder is forgetting to water.
light ☀️: bright light, some direct sun will do great
water💧: let soil dry pretty thoroughly
Ponytail Palm
fancy striped foliage without diva-plant level of care (looking at you calathea). pretty forgiving as long as you don’t keep it soaking wet.
light ☀️: bright indirect
water💧: let top 1-2” of soil dry
Philodendron Birkin
looks fancy right? super manageable once you give it decent light and drainage.
light ☀️: bright indirect with a little morning sun being okay
Philodendron Ring of Fire
beautiful tropical dramatic leaves without requiring any expert-level care. give it good light (does pretty well in a window), don’t drown it, and give it something to climb. she will reward you with increasingly huge split leaves.
light ☀️: bright ...
Monstera Deliciosa
pretty pink foliage with relatively unfussy care. it grows SUPER quickly (my hanging basket is literally overflowing), and will start trailing and climbing as it matures.
light ☀️: medium-bright indirect
water 💧: let top 1-2” of soil dry, pretty f...
Syngonium (Neon Robusta)
syngoniums are available in lots of colors and patterns—like the neon robusta, these other variations are fast-growing and forgiving.
light ☀️: medium-bright indirect
water💧: let top 1-2” of soil dry
Syngonium
for the pink lovers and one of the better choices for rooms that don’t have amazing natural light. slow-growing, sturdy, and generally very forgiving.
light ☀️: low-bright indirect but colorful varieties like brighter light
water 💧: let top 1-2” o...
Chinese Evergreen (Aglaonema)
tall and tree-like without taking up a ton of floor space. drought tolerant and doesn’t need constant attention.
light ☀️: medium-bright indirect and tolerates lower light well
water💧: let about the top half of soil dry
Dracaena Marginata
thick leaves like a succulent that store water. therefore, she prefers neglect to overwatering.
light ☀️: medium-bright indirect
water💧: let at least top half of soil dry
Peperomia Obtusifolia
the name is essentially the sales pitch 😂 it tolerates low light, missed waterings, and many conditions. this is the stoic eldest child to the tantrum throwing middle child (hi begonia) of house plants.
light ☀️: low-medium indirect, she doesn’t li...
Cast Iron Plant (Aspidistra)
cute little spiky succulent thats much happier being forgotten. great for a sunny desk or a windowsill.
light ☀️: bright indirect-some direct some
water💧: let soil dry completely
Haworthia Succulent
new leaves emerge in beautiful shades of orange, eventually turning green. considerably easier to care for than it looks.
light ☀️: bright indirect
water💧: let top 1-2” of soil dry
Philodendron Prince of Orange
useful to have around for sunburn and other skin ailments, sculptural, and extremely drought tolerant. the enemy is too much water, keep her happy and she’ll give you tons of baby plants.
light ☀️: very bright light with ideally several hours of dir...
Aloe Vera
same nearly indestructible energy as a classic snake plant but with chunky, spiky, cylindrical leaves that look a little more architectural.
light ☀️: low-bright indirect and will tolerate some direct sun
water💧: let soil dry completely, i went pr...
Sansevieria Cylindrica
compact, sculptural, and built to tolerate neglect thanks to its thick water storing leaves. very cool looking plant for little effort.
light ☀️: medium-bright indirect with some gentle direct sun being tolerable
water💧: let soil dry completely
Samurai Snake Plant (Dracaena Hanningtonii)
one of the more forgiving indoor palms and much less demanding than the giant tropical palms people bring home and end up committing involuntary manslaughter.
light ☀️: medium-bright indirect is good but will tolerate lower light
water💧: let top 1...
Parlor Palm